Sometimes Learning to be Sober Sucks



My husband went away a few days ago. He will be gone for close to two weeks.  I used to look forward to these alone times, it was more me time, !waning more time to drink.

One of my favorite pass times when I was drinking was watching bad television and really bad girly movies.  I loved sitting in front of the 52 inch television, in the dark watching Hoarders or RHONY, or anything that was utterly and completely mindless.

I have seen every Bring It On, Mean Girls, and every Cameron Diaz movie.  (She gets paid for that?)

I relished my time sipping, pausing, refilling and watching.  It was even better when I was home alone and could do it in the comfort of my bed. Although there was a lot more pause time with trips from the bedroom to the refrigerator in the kitchen for a refill.

So, I was thrown off a bit on my first night alone. I climbed into bed, hooked the laptop to the Roku and began the search for the latest mind numbing teenage flick.  Absolutely nothing appealed to me. I had no desire to watch the new Veronica Mars movie, not Bad Teacher, no Hoarders buried alive marathon.  What the heck was happening?

Being sober has made bad television and cheesy movies no longer interesting.  My carefully planned marathon of girly movies was no longer appealing.

I flipped up and down the guide, searched through the Roku, looked on the laptop,nothing.

The sober voice in my head kept saying, hey, you are reading a really good book, why don’t you just go finish that?

I have read every night he has been gone.  I haven’t watched a minute of television in the evenings.

I guess bad television is just bad when you are sober.  I had a bit of nostalgia for my of ways the first night.  I actually really wanted to get a bottle of wine and watch all of the Bring It On movies back to back.

But I wanted my sober streak more.  I have more back to back sober days than there are Bring It On movies, and they are more important.  Just a other change to adapt to.

He has been gone five nights and I have read two books, and just downloaded a new one.

I guess I’ll go read.bring-it-on_l


25 thoughts on “Sometimes Learning to be Sober Sucks

  1. I completely identify with this. I haven’t actually experienced the not wanting to watch TV part, because I haven’t been home sober yet, and I’ve no TV here. But I know it’s coming. One of the biggest benefits of drinking and smoking weed was that it made it so that I could enjoy TV. I’d get loaded and watch hours and hours of TV. And yes, hell yes, Bring It On! I loved those horrible horrible movies.

  2. Ok, forgive me for responding with an utterly vapid comment here but I LOVED the first BIO movie then thought the second was lame so didn’t even check out the others. Which is the best (worst?) do you think? And I’m sorry, this is probably not the most helpful response! Reading is undoubtedly an ultimately more rewarding use of your time but, hey, there’s a place for rubbish telly too. 🙂

  3. Ahhh it’s funny the things we miss isn’t it? I’m craving a silly film at the moment- going to watch Frozen I think, everyone’s raving about it 🙂 And enjoy the ability to remember what you’ve read- we’ve all been there forgetting what we’ve taken in the night before.

    Big hugs- these alone periods are tough, but if this is the first time you’re doing it, you’re setting yourself a new pattern. Make it as deliciously enjoyable as possible and set a new precedent of how you indulge yourself when you’ve got some me time 🙂

    • I liked both the first and the second. The other ones were not as good.
      If you are looking for a really good girly flick watch Easy A. It stars Emma Stone. I love it! Sober too 🙂

  4. I remember when I quit smoking finding watching TV *really* dull, and have had the same effect (though not so pronounced) with quitting drinking. I think I just watch less TV now so am a bit more picky! While we’re drinking, we think we’re just having a drink while watching our favourite show, whereas in fact, we’re vegging out in front of the TV as something to do whilst getting through the vino – it’s one of the few things you can get away with whilst pie-eyed. Reading just gets too difficult after a few glasses. I watched “Hurricane” starring Denzel Washington on netflix last night (after hearing the news of Rubin “Hurricane” Carter’s death on the news). Though I’m not getting into much TV at the mo, I found this utterly gripping, and so inspirational. Can recommend 🙂

  5. I am the opposite and find myself watching more shows. I watch them on my laptop so either via Netflix or I just finished the Netflix series “House of Cards”.

    I used to go out to a bar with a book. I would order beer or wine and sit alone reading. Then start to reread pages after a few glasses. Then just give up and start a conversation with some stranger or switch to FB or something else on my phone that did not require concentration. I need to start reading more again but with glasses of water. Maybe I can finish a book at a coffee shop instead of a bar.

    I did not realize there were more than one “Bring It On.” Thanks for the information. HA

    • The first two Bring it On movies were okay. Kristen Dunst and Hayden Panittiere. The last two were pure crap. Just something to watch while I got to the bottom of the bottle.
      I am going through books so fast these days. Maybe we need to start a sober ladies book club. We can recommend what we are reading instead of watching bad t.v.

      • Haha well stay away from Maureen McCormick’s memoir. (Marcia Brady.) I got it to read about her overcoming addiction. But I felt she whined and complained the whole time. Right now I am reading some novel that I guess is the equivalent of a girly movie. 🙂

      • Marcia, Marcia, Marcia. I was thinking about trying Mackenzie Phillips memoir until I read that while she was high she had sex with her father. I really don’t want to even think about that.

  6. I could have very easily written this post! Captain and Coke and shitty tv were my pastimes when my husband travelled. Now, he doesn’t travel as much, but he still works late hours (Another time I would self medicate and have a pity party because I was the only parent home…um, what? I really wasn’t parenting..) I have found journalling to be a better outlet and it makes me sleepy- not sure what that says about how I think of my story and/or thoughts but it tends to work. I also have been looking at the 4.99 movies that MIGHt interest my 9 yo. For instance, I found one suitable for him on the Civil War and Abe Lincoln. Since it was inexpensive and he digs that part of history, it fit for us. I also kind of enjoyed the historical viewpoint since I have forgotten some pretty important parts of my education due to drinking and simply not being interested when I learned it the first time. Plus, I was amazed how much my little guy already knew!
    If nothing else works, you can always go to Walgreens and pick up one of those rubber band looms to make kids’ bracelets LOL.
    Keep on keeping on.

    • That is funny. I was the same way in school, zoned out about history. But ask me who Live Schreiber has kids with, oh I know that! Wasted brain space. A great move you and your nine year old can watch together is Second Hand Lions. Awesome cast and story. Not a war or history movie but a nice family story.
      I should have gotten a loom. I decided to strip 25 year old wallpaper and fix and paint the walls.
      I ache all over, but I am not drinking and keeping busy until exhaustion sets in.
      I will keep on keeping on. 🙂

  7. I love netflix, I need to check out house of cards. The series, Orange is the new black is good… I love to read too, have u read, husbands Secret! That’s a good one…..

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s